Expecting the narcissist to actually make your perfect life actualize, only lead to disappointments. The narcissist cannot actually be what he pretends to be and this is not because the narcissist slowly and methodically removes his mask over time but more so, because he cannot actually be a person of depth and substance. Even if the narcissist’s victims mold into what the narcissist claims he wants, he still cannot be a person of depth and substance.
A relationship is impossible for the narcissist not because he is malignant but because he truly has nothing to offer anyone emotionally, and mentally. All a narcissist has is linguistics and fantasy which yes, is enough to lure his victims but never enough to keep them in his life or actually be part of a purposeful relationship.
This is not something that is disappointing but in fact, it is a very important piece of because wasting time on a narcissist’s expectations will leave you alone, miserable and sick.
Relationships consist of acceptance, sharing, caring and unconditional and consistent love. A narcissist cannot actually provide anyone the above.
Some examples of why that is :
-the narcissist cannot talk about you or himself
-the narcissist is of course, not consistent and cannot love anyone not even himself never mind loving someone unconditionally
-the narcissist cannot accept you or himself
-the narcissist cannot effectively problem solve or effectively resolve conflict
-the narcissist cannot hear or validate anyone’s emotions
So as you can see, the narcissist cannot actually be in a relationship. The only thing the narcissist can provide anyone is his presence and not even that is promised or consistent. Essentially, you are not allowed to exist when part of a narcissist’s life.